Archive for Agustus 2013

FIrst Time

Posted by Hana Bilqisthi | Labels : hana's diary

There is always first time moment for everything, is not it?? Today I am going to Yogyakarta and take my firs flight. I never going to someplace with airplane. It is going to be my first time. :D

I am quite excited and tense

I woke up 4 am (while it is suppossed to be time i am ready to go to Soekarno Hatta Airport, and i supposed to be there at 7am.) That is written on my task.

The problem is my house in Karawang. We (my mom and my step dad) got ready to depart from home at 5am and there wa s a little incident. My mom forget to bring printer, that was asked by my younger sister, to the car and my step father did not want to go back to home to get it. (FYI, my sister now at campus orientation and she needs printer.). So, my mom tried to call my brother who was still at home to find out whether he can deliver the printer to our location thankfully my brother can deliver it. Alhamdulillah :D

But the problem has not ended. At Karawang Barat toll, there was a long traffic jam. I quite confused because it is Tuesday. It supposed to be fine. Bad traffic jam is usually on Monday. My mom suspect the cause is car accident but my step father thought that it is just another traffic jam and a sign that Jakarta and Karawang become more crowded. Well, my mom was right. There was a car accident, crush between truck and bus. After we saw that, my step father complained that Jasa Marga quite slow to take care of that because he did not see any officer or police, then when he paid toll, he complained to the officer that was accident that made traffic jam.

My dad saw the toll road was quite ‘lenggang’ so he increased his speed and thankfully it quite good decision because I arrived quite on time. But along the way, i felt frightening and so tense and i feel like i need go to toilet.

Thankfully i arrive at 7.10 am at Soekarno Hatta Airport :D I did not too late .. During the flight i felt so tense.. my tounge felt numb.. there are elder couple who sat next to me and they really nice and tried to have converation with me.. but i feel so tense so i only answer their question or only nodd.. i did not ask them back... They start to ask me when I read the Quran on Plane, they said it is unusual to see seomeone who has young age read quran, they usually saw the elder...

And my planed delayed because there are passangers who have been told that their flight change to mine.. but unfortunately, the plane that i took is full, there are no empty seat and I am forgot to tell fida, my bestie who will pick me up at Adisudjipto Airport... I hope she did not wait too long

When i got at Adisucipto, it is already 11 am while i am suppossed to be arrived at 10 am.. and i thought fida house is quite close to Bandara.. like 10 minutes.. We use trans Jogja and we wait quite long time and when i arrived it is already zuhur... i miss duha prayer :(

Anyway i am really thankful that I arrived safely.. :D
when i got a fida’s house.. i spent a lot time slept.. i felt so tired..
Hoaaam...

Hooray I am not alone \(^0^)/

Hooray I am not alone \(^0^)/
I was so happy when I found out Asta (salah satu member @RANforyourlife) ternyata pendiam suka mengirim surat kepada rekan2nya , pas nonton acara @SarahSechan_NET kemarin :D

Awalnya selama ini gue kira gue tipe yang sangat conservative and old fashion karena lebih suka nulis surat, nulis notes atau blog dan kemudian memberi tahu pihak yang bersangkutan…
Ternyata I am not alone :D
And I realized it is because my introvert side :D

kayak dulu, gue memilih menulis surat ke cowok yang gue suka dibanding ngomong langsung. Ketika gue cerita ke temen2 gue, pertanyaan mereka pertama adalah “Han, kenapa loe ngga janjian ketemuan dan ngomong langsung. Loe emangnya ngga mau liat ekspreksi muka dia apa?
Hm.. I did not think that way.. :/
Gue lebih milih surat karena gue bisa mengungkap seluruh pikiran gue tanpa intervensi
karena sering kali kalau gue cerita langsung, gue yang tadinya mau cerita a-z malah lupa dan akhirnya cerita cuma separuhnya..
atau terkadang gue baru cerita sampai b dan ketika melihat respon lawan bicara gue, gue menyortir atau menyensor hal-hal yang mau gue omongin..
karena seringnya untuk menjawab sesuatu, gue butuh waktu untuk memikirkan responnya.. sering kali gue sedih dan menyesal ketika menjawab suatu pernyataan atau pertanyaan tanpa berpikir terlebih dahulu…

seperti yang gue pernah post sebelumya :

Introverted prefer writing to talking.
They are more comfortable with the written word,
which helps them formulate the spoken word

Sepertinya mungkin di masa yang akan datang gue akan sering nulis surat :D

Sekarang gue paham kenapa gue suka novel Wednesday Letter :D

Ngomong2 soal introvert
Minggu lalu gue dimarahin umi karena menjawab dianggap telah bersikap cuek dan tegaan
jadi, peer Hana (Millenium Super Cool/MSC) message WA (whatsapp) dan mention gue di twitter and bilang kangen
lalu Hana Talita (salah satu anggota Millenium Super Cool) bertanya bolehkan menelpon dan gue menjawab boleh tapi lusa.
Soalnya saat itu gue lagi males ngomong. Gue merasa letih buat ngomong Gue baru dapet kabar kalau abi masuk rumah sakit karena stroke dan gue hampir menangis seharian dan sayangnya gue ngga bisa langsung jenguk abi karena berita abi sakit terlalu mendadak, gue udah dapet izin magang tapi ayah tiri gue belum bisa ninggalin urusan kantornya…
Jadi baru bisa besoknya..
Dengan keadaan gue yang lagi sedih, gue amat sangat tidak mood mengangkat telp dan ngomong (biasanya gue kalau sedih jadi pendiam) dan gue takut melukai perasaan Hana talita dengan menjawab dengan nada tidak bersemangat karena gue lagi sedih.

Umi marah dan bilang kalau Hana Talita pasti akan marah tapi gue yakin kalau Hana Talita bakalan ngerti.
Tapi karena pas perjalanan pergi ngejenguk abi, umi terus membahas hal tersebut
“Je, jeje bayangin nih ya misalnya kalau jeje bilang kangen ke temen jeje dan bilang mau nelpon.. eh temen jeje malah bilang teleponnya lusa aja. Gimana coba?
atau misalnya suami jeje kangen sama jeje, eh sama jeje disuruh telponnya lusa.”
Sepupu gue, Icha juga menambahkan “Kalau gue jadi temen loe mah Hana, batal nelpon gue.. Ngga bakal gue telpon pas lusanya.”

Gue bersikukuh menjawab kalau temen gue bakalan ngerti
tapi kemudian gue jadi ragu.. hm.. gimana kalau omongan umi bener? gimana kalau ternyata Hana Talita marah?

Gue pun segera kirim pesan WA ke Hana Talita, bilang minta maaf dan menjelaskan alasan kenapa gue meminta dia menelpon lusa. Alhamdulillah Hana Talita ngerti dan ngga marah :D
Huft.. I am really lucky to have her as one of my bestie :D
She understands me a lot (˘⌣˘)ε˘`)

Dan tiba2 gue jadi kepikiran.. jangan2 MSC itu isinya introvert juga makanya ngertiin Hana.. I mean I also believe the other members of MSC will understand me too if I say to them to call the day after tomorrow..
Anyway I am glad I have MSC (っ˘▽˘(˘⌣˘と)

o ia, beberapa hari yang lalu gue nemu postingan seru tentang introvert :D

27 problems only introvert will understand
Pas baca poin 15
Horray I am not alone \(^0^)/

I am not weird … I am just an introvert :D

SERIOUS

Posted by Hana Bilqisthi | Labels : hana's diary , Pikiran hana , psikologi

I have been wondering why I often in extreme pole?
I can be so much introvert…
I did not go out at all for two days or a week and spend my days reading books..
thinking about a lot of things

queit, frown

and so much extrovert..
say hi to everyone I meet and initiate to do something…
carefree,relax and did not think about a lot of things
smile a lot

Why it is hard for me to be someone in middle or balancing my extrovert and introvert side?

I just found the answer recently..When my friend told me to relax and did not care about assignment
I am SERIOUSLY relax and did not care about assignment…
I AM SERIOUS PERSON

I am doing everything seriously ..

Well, I just found out one new information or perspective about my self
Alhamdulillah
One case resolved :D
\(^o^)/

IMPOSSIBLE Request

Posted by Hana Bilqisthi | Labels : bahagia , Cinta , hana's diary , islam , marriage , pernikahan , Pikiran hana , random , sad , sedih , ui

PAKET YANG DIDAPATKAN OLEH CALON WISUDAWAN

· Toga Wisudawan

· Buku Alumni

· Foto Resmi Ucapan selamat dari Rektor dan Dekan kepada wisudawan

· "PIAGAM ALUMNI"

· Account untuk Email Alumni (nama@alumni.ui.ac.id)

· Snack Box

· Dokumentasi DVD Upacara Wisuda

· Undangan :

o 1 Undangan untuk Wisudawan

o 1 Undangan untuk keluarga Wisudawan (berlaku 2 orang)

Kuulang membaca kalimat terakhir… berlaku 2 orang, huh?
Ku menghela napas panjang
Dua orang? siapa mereka?
Ya.. biasanya sih orang tua..
tapi gue punya 3 orang orang tua, gue punya ibu (umi), seorang ayah (abi), dan seorang ayah tiri (om yul). Tiga orang dan undangannya untuk dua orang
Gue kembali menghela napas. Gue harus menyisihkan salah satu.
It is tough choice. How could I choose between one of them? :’(

Skenario 1:
Tadinya rencana gue adalah gue bakal ngundang umi dan abi, dan kemudian minta maaf sama om yul karena ngga ngundang beliau. Tapi ketika gue bilang hal tersebut ke umi. Umi bilang hal itu ngga mungkin om yul bakal marah dan umi juga ngga bisa dateng karena abi bukan mahram umi dan om yul pasti ngelarang umi buat dateng. Umi bilang kalau gue harus memilih.
Aih… I hate to choose..
I am afraid I hurt one of them..

Skenario 2 :
I did not invite mydad karena sebenarnya mudah saja jika gue ngga ngundang abi. I mean he is rarely involved in my life. The one who raised me is my mom. The one who work for my tuition fee and my living expenses is also my my mom. I could easily tell my dad that I don’t invite him because he never involved in my life. Where are you when I miss you,Dad?! Where are you when I need you, dad?! Nowhere..
I hate you so much dad.. I hate you.. You don’t care about me so I do not care about you. Yup I can tell him that the reason I don’t invite him is REVENGE.
Gue tahu gue bakal bisa membalas perlakukan abi dan akan merasa impas kalau gue ngga ngundang beliau. It is easier to do but it did not feel right.
I just realized it when I heard my father got stroke. Melihat beliau kesakitan membuat gue sadar gue ngga mau melihat beliau sakit ataupun sedih. So revenge is not an option and revenge is not a good thing to do. Forgiving is better. I want to invite him because I want to tell him that I forgive him. I do not want to have this cold father-daughter relationship.

But I cannot eliminate my mother and my step father. I have very nice step father who really care about me and my siblings.

Skenario 3:
Find out a way to invite them all. Maybe I could ask one of my friend who has only one parent to ask whether one of my parent can join the invitation or ask a lecturer. Or maybe I could ask my mom to pretend to be so she the one who wear toga and I am the one who will not come to graduation ceremony.

Skenario 4:
I did not invite them all. I get married before I graduated and invite my husband to come and none of my parents.

Then I tried scenario 3 and it did not work out. Ah… I knew from the start.. because it is impossible request. Who am I ask for more invitation? (,_,)
Yah… It is impossible..
Yah
Yah… It is impossible..
… IT IS IMPOSSIBLE..
Yeah.. who is person who can I ask for impossible request?
It struck me.
Han, It is IMPOSSIBLE REQUEST!!! It is IMPOSSIBLE REQUEST! :D
And I knew the One who I can ask for that..
He is Allah SWT
Astagfirullah
How could I forget such thing?!
Because it is impossible, I should ask to The One who can turn out IMPOSSIBLE become POSSIBLE :D

Bismillah

“ya Allah, I ask for more invitation so all my parent can come to graduation ceremony or I ask you the best way to solve this problem (which two that I should invite) or maybe You have a better way to solve this problem that I have not think about. Amin”

Okay, I admit..
Gue lebay..
Skripsi aja belum kelar udah mikirin wisuda.. Hehehe ^^v
Gue stress karena mikirnya udah kejauhan :D
Sekarang yang penting selesain dlu skripsinya (^0^)9
Wish me luck Guys :D